100 Things you probably don’t need to know about me (51-100)

51. I am irrationally afraid of slugs. Please don’t tell me they are like snails, but without the shells. I am *irrationally* afraid of slugs.

52. I also don’t like maggots, worms, caterpillars and other things without legs or that move as if they don’t have legs. For some reason, snakes are okay. Snakes don’t make my skin crawl or my heart jump. Slugs, maggots, worms and caterpillars all do. Like I said: irrational.

53. I like compost. I worry about how to compost when living in a flat. I know worms are necesary for compost. But they still make my skin crawl.

54. I sing silly songs, like “oh little wormy, why are you so squirmy?” or “bed time, bed time, it’s time to go to bed – TIME!”. For some reason, silly songs come out of me in flowery abundance just prior to bedtime.

55. I am an appalling singer.

56. But I have a lot of enthusiasm.

57. I talked a lot as a child. I sang, too. Almost non-stop, according to my parents and siblings. I only stopped when I had a book to read.

58. I talk a lot, now. This is why my blog posts are so long, and sometimes, why my comments run on and on.

59. I take things literally. I am a ‘concrete thinker’.

60. I still sometimes take phrases literally. I also like to have phrases explained to me.

61. I love language. I love words, their meaning and their etymology. Once upon a time I was going to grow up to be a semantist.

62. I love languages. I keep picking up another language to learn. I have tried to teach myself Esperanto (oh!). It was fun but I did not follow through.

63. I don’t follow through rather often.

64. I always follow through on promises I make to people.

65. But not on my many and varied projects.

66. I like to think of myself as a polymath.

67. I’m not.

68. I often forget my family members’ birthdays.

69. My excuse is that I have a lot of family. But really, that’s not a very good excuse, is it?

70. Although most people think I am an extrovert because of my self-confidence and ability to talk to complete strangers, and probably for other reasons too, I am an introvert.

71. No, really. I am an introvert.

72. I am an egomaniac.

73. And a megalomaniac.

74. I’ve been practising my evil laugh for when I take over the world.

75. The pragmatic side of my megalomania means that I am obsessive compulsive.

76. Have I mentioned that I am a lawyer?

77. Democracy is not the most efficient way to make decisions.

78. But then, the value of efficiency is questionable.

79. Unless you are deciding where to eat dinner. Then efficiency is important in direct proportion to how hungry I am.

80. In social relations, tyranny can work.

81. I believe that the ends cannot and do not ever justify the means.

82. Otherwise, I probably do not believe in any absolutes. I’m not sure though. I might believe in more absolutes than this.

83. No, I don’t believe that Thou Shalt Not Kill is an absolute.

84. Maybe sometimes I do believe that the ends justify the means.

85. Ice cream will always make me happy. (That is connected to the last, but it’s difficult to explain how).

86. Kurt Elling sings in wailing tones: “Ice Cr reeeam!” followed by a panicked “Sea Lions! Sea Lions!” I really like that song.

87. I am what I call an “oscillating sociable vegetarian”. Or perhaps I am a social omnivore. Anyway, I eat meat in company, I will cook meat for friends and family, and I eat meat in restaurants (what is called the Paris Exemption in Peter Singer’s & Jim Mason’s The Ethics of What we Eat).

89. Tofu is great. I love tofu.

90. Of the meat I eat, I much prefer red meat – beef, ‘roo, lamb – to white – pork, chicken. turkey, duck.

91. I once heard pigs squealing and screaming while a family member (of the pigs’, not of mine) was being slaughtered for a feast. This was a horrible sound. I’ll post about it.

92. I really like fish. But I prefer little fish, not big fish.

93. I also prefer little fruit and vegetables to big fruit and vegetables.

94. Bramley apples are disturbingly large. Although they make delicious apple crumble.

95. I am not very good at obeying recipes. For this reason, my baking adventures do not always have happy results.

96. I am not very good at obeying lots of things – rules, people I don’t respect, & so on – even though I am a lawyer.

97. If you google my full name, you find me. Otherwise you find a lot of other people who could be me, but aren’t.

98. I google myself regularly. See no. 72.

99. I’m small.

100. But vicious.

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3 Comments

  1. Re 54. I still have songs in my head that my brother used to bring home from kindergarten. It was the cutest thing when he sang: ‘Good morning, good morning, the bright sun is shining. Good morning, good morning, and a happy day to you’. It’s not quite so endearing when I sing it now. Some might even say annoying.

    Reply

  2. No, I cannot possibly agree. I am certain it is endearing. You would have to be a right old curmudgeon not to find such high spirits endearing!

    Reply

  3. haha I share your irrational fear of slugs actually. Well, I even have a phobia of all creatures with no legs e.g. snakes, worms, slugs etc.

    Reply

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